Things are a little better. I’ve been praying more and I turned the dial off of local oldies and back to Christian radio; maybe that’s part of it. I was pretty much dreading this week but it’s okay. I’m just tired.

I’ve been in the car SO MUCH and it’s so freaking hot, ha ha. My window doesn’t roll down at the moment but Ben did a great job taping it up. The only bummer is that it’s difficult to drive through anywhere, so I don’t, and that greatly reduces quick stops for a nice cold drink or frozen treat. Cause getting out is such a bummer.

Anyway, I had to drive Sarah to and from band each day. I’ve been giving Bennett rides to work, but there is some forward momentum on his car getting fixed, hooray! I also have to drive Sarah to and from the theater each day. I sure wish she had her drivers’ license. It’s difficult to get her enough driving hours. But I also have some help coming on that, so hopefully that works out soon. I would really rather her be able to drive herself to the little places she has to go in town!

Then Mom had to go to the dentist. I took her on Monday. And her caregiver couldn’t come on Monday. So after getting Sarah to band, I got mom changed and got her meds and got her breakfast and then took her all the way to Oklahoma City (a whole hour to her dentist, bleah) and got in the parking garage and got a ticket from the machine (had to open my door and get out, fun) then we walked from the garage to the building and it was soooo hot. She kept saying she couldn’t make it and I was like, “Well, you have to, you can’t just sit down on the ground,” and we made it. Got directions from the front desk, took the elevator upstairs, got to the clinic, and THE APPOINTMENT WAS ON WEDNESDAY.

Back down the elevator, back across the desert plains, back to the parking garage, back to the car, got to the attendant and had to open the door again, hilarious, and drove back to Tuttle. We stopped and got Sarah from band. We did not get a cold drink or ice cream because there was no way with the broken window. Then Sarah had theater and I had to work on my stories for the paper but anyway.

I wrote newspaper stuff on Tuesday and then on Wednesday the caregiver came and I got Sarah to band, Bennett to work, and Krislyn and I went to a theater meeting. That went well. As soon as I got back I got Mom in the car and we repeated Monday. But this time Karlene had told me about the shuttle system and so we got to do the shuttle from the parking garage, which helped greatly, and of course, her appointment actually happened. I read in the waiting room. Mom’s hygenist is Leah and she is really nice.

So yeah. Then today I got the program done for the theater and they look good. Got all the driving the people all the places done. Sent an email to someone for another story for the paper.

I’m still not writing on my novel. That’s what I really feel like I should be doing. But other than that, it’s okay for now.

I finished Dungeon Crawler Carl book 8. Now I’m reading Six of Crows. It’s the favorite book of someone I love, so I’m glad I’m getting time to read it. I’d like to do the audiobooks of the Dungeon Crawler Carl series soon.

I miss doing things at the theater, but I know I just can’t do that right now. I miss my SCBWI meetings and friends, but I guess it’s not the season for that either. I keep going back and forth. Keep fighting the waves and try to keep writing? Or just let go and drift for now – maybe forever? I don’t know. I just don’t know.

My garden looks nice. One cucumber plant died. But I spilled some birdseed a while back and there’s a big sunflower now. Also what I’m guessing is millet? So that’s interesting.

I’ve eaten watermelon every day for like the past five days. And a lot of Oklahoma peaches. So I realy don’t see how things could be that terrible. Would I still like to let go of some of the things I do? Yes. Would I still like to rest just a bit more? Yes. But it’s okay. Today it is okay.

I am thankful. And I am tired.